Friday, June 17, 2011

Guest post: Haley from

As my trip is nearing an end so are the guest posts! San Francisco has been nothing but full or gorgeous weather and wonderful adventures, but tonight  I start the final fleet of flights back to Australia and back to the boy who will be giving the final guest post!

Until then I Haley will keep you plenty entertained with one of her crazy adventures while she's abroad in Germany. Seriously, check this chick's blog out. It's hilarious!

Hello friends, I'm Hayley and I blog over at 
I'm about to leave my year abroad in Germany, and head back home to California.
I love seeing the world, it's places, people, and culture, and my favorite word is wanderlust.
I have big plans to travel abroad again soon, but in the meantime I'll be exploring my coast and the rest of the USA.
I hope you want to come along too!
Once upon a time, my best friend Kendall came to visit me in Germany. By 'once upon a time', I really mean three weeks ago. 
We did fun things. I showed her around. But mostly, we drank. She isn't 21, so being able to drink in bars, clubs, fairs, and even in the streets became our go to activity for the 10 days she was here.
[Kendall has red hair, I have brown. Just in case you were wondering.]

When the time came for us to go to Amsterdam, we were stoked. We decided to invite two of my German guy friends along and the four of us had a fantastic time walking around, being tourists, and, you guessed it...drinking.
So, I guess the point in sharing this background info is so that you can get a sense of our mental state come Kendall's last Saturday in Europe. We left Amsterdam in the afternoon, meaning we got home in the evening due to slower trains and multiple stops. We had gone to the Heineken Museum that morning and I was definitely drunk all day. Kendall ,a bit buzzed. We also engaged in some typical Amsterdam activity involving a substance that is illegal everywhere else...except in Amsterdam. So we were pretty inebriated/altered. 

Kendall and I need to board a train at 8:00am the next morning to get to the Dusseldorf Airport for her international flight at 1:40pm. Kendall and the boys wanted to go out that night. I was exhausted and still drunk at this point since I had decided on the train the best possible beverage to buy to was another beer. But, she's my friend and only in town for one more night so I figured what could go wrong?
I don't have any photos of this night back in Germany. I wish I did since my outfit would later come into play, but basically we looked/felt like this:

Hours later, literally it's like 5:40am, we decided we should probably leave the bar. We grab a taxi with the boys, and get home safely. We decide that it's best if we just stay awake and get on the bus at 7:30. Shouldn't be hard right? Wrong. We fell asleep. This is where everything went downhill.

"Hayley! Fuck! What time is it?!"

I shoot up and grab my phone. 

"Shit, shit, shit! Oh my God, Oh my God!"

"Oh shit! Oh my god Kendall, holy crap we've gotta go! We are so late!"

Tears have begun at this point. Not from me, I'm still drunk, and I never cry when I'm drunk.

Kendall repeats multiple swear words, as do I. She grabs her already packed bag, and I throw on some shoes and grab my 50 pound bag of winter clothes that she is taking home for me.
I'd now like to talk about my outfit:
Skinny jeans, Rainbow flip flops, a white and black leopard print tube top, and a wind breaker type of jacket. Topped off with my smudged make up and large feather earrings. I grabbed my aviators too.
 We run to the bus stop, and while waiting for the bus I attempt to call my friend in hopes that he can get a car and drive us. I called 8 times, no answer. I'm now trying to reassure her that everything is fine. But through minor hysterics she's basically just repeating things like, 
"I'm going to miss my flight, and be stuck in Germany forever, I'll never get into the summer class I need and now I wont transfer on time!"

Clearly, what will happen when you are late or have missed one flight from Germany to NYC.

I'm still trying to calm her down on the bus because frankly, I know it'll be fine, and I'm super drunk still. This is a serious issue for me and I decide at this moment one should never drink alcohol after 2:00am. We get to the train station, but since it's Sunday the office wont open until 10:00. It's 9:15. I'm forced to swipe my credit card for the first time this day in a self help ticket kiosk for our tickets to the first train station. We grab coffee, and I get a water and a Twix bar for myself. Essential, I know. We board our train which of course is packed. Why a train is packed on a Sunday morning I'm not sure, but we are forced to sit on shabby fold out seats with our human sized bags. Things are starting to calm down, we she realizes that there is nothing more that can be done, we're en route to Dusseldorf. An hour or so later we get off at our connecting station and get on a shorter train to the next stop. We are here for a total of 20 minutes, and at minute 19, as we are getting ready to get off and run to the next train, the dude comes around for our tickets. We don't have any. I was planning on buying them on the train, but the guy never came around. I know it's bad to ride for free, but we were in a major rush. So I then swipe my card for the second time that day. We fly across the platform to our next train headed to the airport. Or so we thought...

This is how we felt but as you can imagine, there are no photos from this adventure.

The train we jumped on was actually headed to the main Dusseldorf station, 10 miles away form the airport. Upon mentioning this to Kendall, hysterics have begun again.
I make a mental note at this point to find a beer.

We get off at the station, sprint to the taxi's which thankfully take credit card since neither of us have cash. Awesome. So I've swiped it three times thus far. We finally make it to the airport, Kendall meets up with her stepdad, and of course the plane is delayed. Not to mention the fact that my fight or flight responses kicked ass and got us there around 11:40am. I knew it would be fine.
Oh, but wait, my human sized bag that has been on my back during all of the sprints, runs, dashes, flying, what have you, is overweight. So there goes the credit card for a fourth time. 

We say our goodbyes, reminisce about the drunk guys, smelly homeless gypsies, and screaming children on the trains this morning and I head back to the train station (at the airport). I'm now swiping the damn card for a fifth time. Get my ticket, get on the train, get a beer, relax on the floor next to the toilet since this is the most packed train I've ever seen in my life and I just want to be alone, damn it! I reflect on the morning, decide that I can do anything, realize that I am definitely buzzed still especially with the breakfast beer in my hand. I ask myself questions like, 
"How many times can a person swipe a credit card in one day?" 
"How many days have I been wearing these jeans?"
"Why am I wearing sandals wen it's raining?"
"Why do these teenagers smell so bad? And why do they still have girls hanging on them, despite the shit smell?"

But the best question was after I discovered that I was missing something essential.
"I wonder if anyone has noticed that I'm not wearing a bra?"

Moral of the story: do not fall asleep drunk when you need to get on an early train hours later.
I know that we were extremely lucky. Getting there on time, especially not being sober, we were safe, and I made it home safely, and alone. We are very lucky. But, I have to laugh as I think about this morning and how haggard we must have looked to everyone else. Only in Europe, right?

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